GO. AND LOVE.
So. White. And. Nerdy. ROFL.
There are four lights! There are FIVE lights!
Ok, I started this post with the need to say something coherent about my life, but that soon ended. /sigh.
Anyway, I started a new blog....like I need one more. But I've felt a need to have a place where I can talk about my religion exclusively, and be part of Pagan-ish communities. I haven't let on, but since that internet war that I posted about a while ago I've felt very...blank and closed, I guess would be closest to what I'm feeling. I feel nervous about ever saying anything about what I believe again, for fear of reprisals, and actually not even really sure about my faith. It's affected me on a very deep level (the religion level), more than I care to admit. But since it happened I've found it hard to concentrate on the faith-based activities I should be concentrating on. My last ritual sucked. Really sucked. And it's because this issue is in the back of my mind.
So. White. And. Nerdy. ROFL.
There are four lights! There are FIVE lights!
Ok, I started this post with the need to say something coherent about my life, but that soon ended. /sigh.
Anyway, I started a new blog....like I need one more. But I've felt a need to have a place where I can talk about my religion exclusively, and be part of Pagan-ish communities. I haven't let on, but since that internet war that I posted about a while ago I've felt very...blank and closed, I guess would be closest to what I'm feeling. I feel nervous about ever saying anything about what I believe again, for fear of reprisals, and actually not even really sure about my faith. It's affected me on a very deep level (the religion level), more than I care to admit. But since it happened I've found it hard to concentrate on the faith-based activities I should be concentrating on. My last ritual sucked. Really sucked. And it's because this issue is in the back of my mind.
It shouldn't really bother me that much, I suppose, and technically she didn't say anything mean-spirited, at least if you're an objective observer. But the truth is that since telling her in pm that I admired her, her posts to me had been getting steadily more challenging and critical--as if she was testing me, my devotion to my mistress, as I'm sure it translated to her.
After my last post I sent her a pm saying sorry if I came off too heavy-handed. Haven't heard back from her yet. Don't think I will.
And I've come to realize...all that glitters is not gold. In standard form that quote probably would not apply here, but I feel it does. So.
Anyway. I'm trying to heal. But it's hard. So I feel this other blog will help.
over and out
Jagged
