I've been reading more feminist blogs lately (used to be a bad idea, but I've found that by this point a lot of feminists have calmed down and there's less anger, more coherent arguments -- always a good thing) and apparently it's held by a large portion of the feminist camp that cats are the true feminist pet to have, whereas dogs are looked down upon.
I am joining my fellow feminist dog lovers
Renee (at Womanist Musings),
Jill (at Feministe), and
Season of the Bitch and blogging about my particular canine companion, Major, and my thoughts on cats/dogs and feminism/patriarchy.
Right off the bat, I'm going to say that I'm not going to talk about similarities between dogs and women (slaves to men, "man's best friend," all that jazz) and such -- the other bloggers already did that, and frankly it's a moot point in my mind. I am going to talk about aspirations, however -- what we aspire to be, what we should aspire to be, and who or what we should hold in our esteem -- and, indeed, our friendship.
We've come a long way as women, thanks to a lot of things, but mainly feminism. But one thing we've forgotten, I think, is sisterhood. Friendship. We've become a bunch of competitive, catty (there's a reason for that word), sniping harpies, picking on each other for not being 'feminist enough' or being 'too feminist'. Frankly, my advice to the people on both ends of the spectrum is to CHILL. THE. FUCK. OUT.
I stopped calling myself a feminist for a while, because I didn't like what the word had come to mean. It apparently meant "man-hating butch" who, while espousing all the ways men and the patriarchy are evil, strives to be like a man in every respect while also stating that ANYthing that pleases men is BAD. Pictures of women being sexual? BAD, because a man might find pleasure in it. Wearing skirts and nice clothing? BAD, because a man might find pleasure in it -- we should all get buzz-cuts and wear camo while talking about castrating every man we see. Actuallly, I think a really really good example of the kind of "feminist" I'm talking about can be found in the movie PCU, wherein the "womynists" (oh gods, people, learn your fucking etymologies and realize that changing a few letters in a word to make it more "politically correct" or whatever nonsense you're spouting just makes you look stupid) fit this description quite well. (In fact, the movie is great to watch for many reasons, that being just one of them.) And yes, I have met women who, while maybe not being as extreme as I have described, do fit the general bill. As I said, it's a spectrum.
On the other end of that spectrum is, of course, the backlash against feminism -- women should just "shut up and get face-fucked" by their husbands because what else is a woman's mouth good for except to hold her master's penis? Don't rock the boat, ladies, we have a pretty good racket going here! Shush -- you should be grateful for what you have.
Blah, blah, blah -- ad infinitium.
This, ladies, is bullshit. Manure. Both viewpoints border on fundamentalism. And holding the more extreme one that gave birth to the term "feminazi" makes people ashamed to be feminist. My brother told me that he used to consider himself a feminist until he took a women's studies class. I wasn't particularly surprised. I know many women who refuse -- flat out refuse -- to call themselves feminist because of the negative connotations the word holds.
Um, ladies -- we did this to ourselves. Taking a viewpoint and going so incredibly extreme with it makes us look stupid. That's why so many feminists aren't taken seriously -- because of that man-hating, militantly anti-anythingyoulike attitude.
There is a rift in the feminist community -- not just between these two viewpoints, but let's stay here for now. Feminists can't get along -- when really, we should, even when we don't agree. Especially when we don't agree. Is your best friend someone who shares your every viewpoint? Didn't think so -- and yet the two of you get on famously. Why should it be any different with any other group of intelligent, thinking, mature people? I disagree with many, many people -- with many feminists, come to mention it. We're still civil, we still get along. There is no reason not to.
Which brings me to my point about cats and dogs.
Now, I am going to say right now that I am a panspecieslover -- I'll pet anything (without spikes or, you know, venom), and I love most every animal alive. I think skunks, snakes, lizards, turtles, and tapirs are cute, and I love cats. I am not so fond of insects or arthropods, but I do tolerate their presence so long as they do not crawl on me. So I do love animals quite a bit. I am not particularly arguing in favor of one animal or another in a general sense -- however, in a feminist sense I am arguing in favor of dogs, especially regarding what feminists should aspire to be -- not what we already are.
It was mentioned that women have a lot in common with dogs -- we've been oppressed by the patriarchy for far too long, at least in Western society -- and that we should support our bitch sisters in solidarity, to help free them from the oppression. I don't find such comparisons helpful. Why confine ourselves to what has defined us for so many years? Why not look forward to what we can be?
Yes, dogs are oppressed by people. I won't deny this. Yes, people oppress each other. This is obvious. However, the main point we're lacking here is the enlightenment of dogs.
Dogs are lovers. They will find that one redeeming quality in you and love you for it. If a dog does not care for a person, watch out -- there's no redeeming quality there to love. They are good judges of character, but they are not judgemental. They will not hate you because you come home in a foul mood because that jerk you work for made a sexist comment and you can't say anything lest you get fired and you really need the money so you can't risk losing the only job in this one-horse town. They will not tell you to shut up. They will not tell you your feelings are not valid. They will sit and listen to you vent, and when you're done, or maybe while you're venting, they will give you a small lick on the hand or foot, a sort of "It's okay, Mistress. I love you!"
Dogs are generous in their befriending of others. My dog, Major, is a particularly good example of this. He wants to be friends with everybody! Cat, dog, baby, adult, porcupine, bear -- you name it, he'll sniff it, give it a lick, and play with it. Major is a true friend -- he'll be by your side in the tough times, and scouting ahead for danger. He always has a smile for you or a lick for your hand.
He's a smart cookie, too. When we made the decision to adopt him after having him in our house for a few days, mom made the call to the SPCA and told them we'd decided to keep him. After the phone call he came up to each of us and gave us a lick on our hands, saying "Thank you." It was completely obvious he'd understood everything we'd said and was grateful he got to be with us (we're his third owners). He listens when we talk. He understands what we say. He lets us be ourselves. He is, unquestionably, his own self in this family. In fact he may be the most genuine member of this family.
Cats are different. They don't make friends the way dogs do -- a cat may be your friend, but he'll be there when it's damn convienient to him, not when you need him. (I'm sure there are cat owners who will disagree, but I'm speaking in generalizations for the sake of argument.) Cats are independent, sure, so they're easier to have around. But they're also loners moreso than dogs -- they represent the individualistic mentality that characterizes so much of America, whereas dogs represent the pack mentality. Pack mentality is usually looked down upon, but if you go and read up on or watch a few movies about wolf packs, you'll see what a cohesive, loving family unit one is. Community is important. That's a good point, so I'll say it again.
Community is important. There is no community with felines, no cat coterie. Cats are independent creatures and I think the reason they appeal to so many feminists is because of our own struggle for independence. I think what most feminists have forgotten is the importance of of remembering our community -- our community of other women -- while we struggle to be ourselves.
It's hard to be a feminist when so many other people -- some self-proclaimed feminists, some not -- are telling you what you're doing wrong for the movement.
"Don't wear so much make-up -- you're not feminist enough."
"Don't wear that flannel -- it makes you look like a lesbian."
"FEMINISTS DON'T WEAR SKIRTS AND HEELS WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU THINKING?"
None of these attitudes are helpful! They're catty comments -- like cat-scratches, they hurt [the cause].
Feminists need to remember their sisters. They need to emulate the dog and extend a paw in friendship to other feminists. No more of this catty isolationism -- we need to recall community and do things for the good of the pack, not our own self-serving interests.
Major understands this. He's been our best friend for the past two (almost three!) years. He's shown us the way, and has been instrumental in our joining the small-town community of Powell River, and forging friendships with other strong-minded women. Some feminist, some not, but it really doesn't matter, because Major teaches us a valuable lesson -- we need to have a strong pack if we want to survive. Lone wolves, while they may be bad-ass and cool looking, don't last long in the wilderness.
My argument has been made, so here are some obligatory puppy pictures!
Beautiful boy! So happy looking!
What a friendly dog!
Over and out,
-Katje
