I moved in my furniture at the house today, and as R had to work and couldn't make it, I just chose the bigger half of the room. Now, technically, 'bigger half' is an oxy-moron, but it's true that the room, when split down the middle, does have one side that's just a few squares of tile bigger. I have a lot of crap. So I took that side. And he will just have to deal with it, because I'm a Princess. And a spoiled one at that.
After moving in my stuff, my darling mom was kind enough to take me shopping. First we went to Wal-Mart, The Lair of Evils Beyond Imagining That Will Undoubtedly Make Your Soul Shrivel and Curdle and Scream in Agony, where the Christmas rush has begun in earnest. I wanted to scream. First, there's the flourescent lights, which make your eyes and your brain ache. Second, the place is full of Americans--Gaea's bad seed (excepting, of course, all the intelligent liberals who live in the blue states--and some from the red (hi, Em)). I mean, FULL of Americans. Everywhere. I couldn't walk one foot without having to stop for some fucking soccer mom to back up her fucking cart full of fucking plastic shit that neither she nor her screaming children need while she talks on her newest DeathPocket, ie cell phone, about how the zucchinis are coming in FINE, oh and is Jimmy coming over for Christmas, because last time he kind of shot the dog when he was aiming for that deer that was eating my roses, and while I'm glad he was about to kill one of God's creatures in the traditional American way of shoot first, ask questions later, don't do prayers at all because it was a HEATHEN, the kids really were fond of that dog, and she was a pain to replace, because we had to go through all the puppy stuff again, and it just made a huge mess of my Martha Stewart Every Fucking Day linens, because we had to do a bit of bloodletting for the Dark One (no, not Satan--Bush), and what I'm really saying that if Jimmy is coming over, fine, but just tell him to leave his gun at home and of course your homemade 40 proof egg nog is certainly welcome.
I fucking hate Wal-Mart and the whole "Christmas is about buying crap, not the traditional dying god myth nor the rebirth of light and the ending of the cycle at all, because Pagans don't have a right to be who they are or to believe what they believe in because they're not CHRISTIAN, DAMMIT, and ooh, that tree will go wonderfully with the other six", because that's not what the holiday season is about at fucking all, and if I see one more piece of fucking useless Christmas kistch, I'm going to fucking scream.
So, after I bought a shower curtain (plaid and blue) at Wal-Mart, we headed over to Ross to see if they had that over the door coat hanger thingy, because I thought it would be great for our room, except when I saw it a few days ago I didn't have any cash, so I thought I'd go back for it, and of course IT WAS GONE, and Ross was like "YOU LOSE", so I said fuck it and bought some pastries and Milano cookies and a coffee drink from Safeway before we headed over to K-Mart, which was not crowded at all, and was, aside from the 20 foot snowman in the entryway and the field of about 15 trees at the back of the store, relatively Christmas Free. It was a really nice experience, actually, because I didn't feel like a caged liberal who had to do her buying quickly and get out of there before they found her and gave her a lobotomy for thinking her own thoughts, like I did in Wal-Mart. I had a nice leisurely shop, and I found a twin foamie mattress for my room, and some Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles sheets + pillow that I told Mom to get me for Yule/Hanukkah, and she said ok, and then for myself I bought (aside from the mattress which was a steal at $60) a TMNT placemat--vinyl, no less--and something that I've wanted since I was a little girl, when they were still a left-over 80s fad: an 80s-style Caboodles plastic make-up carrier, in purple. Oh, I was happy with that.
Then we went and got a Jamba Juice, because STRONG UKRAINIAN WOMEN DRINK THE JAMBA, but it wasn't the Jamba at the mall so I didn't get to check out that cute girl behind the counter. I satisfied myself with scaring the crap out of the workers at the Jamba we did go to.
And then we went home and I've been here ever since.
Ok, so I've decided something today: FUCK CHRISTMAS. All the goddamn (yes, godddamn, because no one ever asked Jesus what he wanted for his flipping birthday, now did they?) holiday has ever been for me has been hell. Somehow, it's always been ruined, and usually by the token males in my life. Either it was my father yelling at me till I threw up my Christmas dinner when I was two or slamming the door in my face last year on Christmas Eve when I was trying to spend the day with him and sobbing, or that asshole Peter J. Russell, and I put his full name in here so that if you ever meet him (about six foot, curly blond hair, white), you can kill him, sending me a letter on Yule, which is what my Pagan life celebrates and is a few days before Christmas, which is what my non-Pagan life celebrates, telling me that it's all over between us when it never fucking began. Seems that 95% of the Christmases that I've had have been spent sobbing in a corner somewhere before drowning my sorrows in a funny Billy Bob Thorton movie and then going back to sobbing for the rest of the winter break.
So, yes, I hate Christmas, and frankly, I don't think anyone should be celebrating it at all when there is a war going on, or did no one think about the Iraqis dying miserable deaths in holy cities, their women and children slaughtered by American soldiers, and American soldiers slaughtered in Bush's Quest for Oil? Unlike Link's Quest for Ass, this quest is nothing to laugh at. And Americans have the gall to ignore the sufferings of other peoples and go on their merry way, because hey, the war isn't being fought on American soil!
I fucking hate Wal-Mart and the whole "Christmas is about buying crap, not the traditional dying god myth nor the rebirth of light and the ending of the cycle at all, because Pagans don't have a right to be who they are or to believe what they believe in because they're not CHRISTIAN, DAMMIT, and ooh, that tree will go wonderfully with the other six", because that's not what the holiday season is about at fucking all, and if I see one more piece of fucking useless Christmas kistch, I'm going to fucking scream.
So, after I bought a shower curtain (plaid and blue) at Wal-Mart, we headed over to Ross to see if they had that over the door coat hanger thingy, because I thought it would be great for our room, except when I saw it a few days ago I didn't have any cash, so I thought I'd go back for it, and of course IT WAS GONE, and Ross was like "YOU LOSE", so I said fuck it and bought some pastries and Milano cookies and a coffee drink from Safeway before we headed over to K-Mart, which was not crowded at all, and was, aside from the 20 foot snowman in the entryway and the field of about 15 trees at the back of the store, relatively Christmas Free. It was a really nice experience, actually, because I didn't feel like a caged liberal who had to do her buying quickly and get out of there before they found her and gave her a lobotomy for thinking her own thoughts, like I did in Wal-Mart. I had a nice leisurely shop, and I found a twin foamie mattress for my room, and some Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles sheets + pillow that I told Mom to get me for Yule/Hanukkah, and she said ok, and then for myself I bought (aside from the mattress which was a steal at $60) a TMNT placemat--vinyl, no less--and something that I've wanted since I was a little girl, when they were still a left-over 80s fad: an 80s-style Caboodles plastic make-up carrier, in purple. Oh, I was happy with that.
Then we went and got a Jamba Juice, because STRONG UKRAINIAN WOMEN DRINK THE JAMBA, but it wasn't the Jamba at the mall so I didn't get to check out that cute girl behind the counter. I satisfied myself with scaring the crap out of the workers at the Jamba we did go to.
And then we went home and I've been here ever since.
Ok, so I've decided something today: FUCK CHRISTMAS. All the goddamn (yes, godddamn, because no one ever asked Jesus what he wanted for his flipping birthday, now did they?) holiday has ever been for me has been hell. Somehow, it's always been ruined, and usually by the token males in my life. Either it was my father yelling at me till I threw up my Christmas dinner when I was two or slamming the door in my face last year on Christmas Eve when I was trying to spend the day with him and sobbing, or that asshole Peter J. Russell, and I put his full name in here so that if you ever meet him (about six foot, curly blond hair, white), you can kill him, sending me a letter on Yule, which is what my Pagan life celebrates and is a few days before Christmas, which is what my non-Pagan life celebrates, telling me that it's all over between us when it never fucking began. Seems that 95% of the Christmases that I've had have been spent sobbing in a corner somewhere before drowning my sorrows in a funny Billy Bob Thorton movie and then going back to sobbing for the rest of the winter break.
So, yes, I hate Christmas, and frankly, I don't think anyone should be celebrating it at all when there is a war going on, or did no one think about the Iraqis dying miserable deaths in holy cities, their women and children slaughtered by American soldiers, and American soldiers slaughtered in Bush's Quest for Oil? Unlike Link's Quest for Ass, this quest is nothing to laugh at. And Americans have the gall to ignore the sufferings of other peoples and go on their merry way, because hey, the war isn't being fought on American soil!
The last war fought on American soil was the Civil War--over a hundred years ago. We've forgotten what real wartime is like. We've forgotten what it's like to suffer at the hands of an invading army. And in forgetting, we inflict that pain on others.
I'm not saying that I'm perfect---far from it. And I'm not saying that I'm going to live in depression because of what's happening in other parts of the world until the bad stuff stops, because if I did that I'd never be happy. What I'm saying is this: it seems that no one realizes the real issues at hand here, and they will go along blindly with whatever's decided because, in the immortal[ly stupid] words of Britney Spears, "We should trust the President with whatever he decides," until this country has none of its original values intact. Remember, America was founded on dissent and by people trying to break away from a tyrant. That's a far cry from what's happening now.
So, I boycott the traditional Christian Christmas and the BUYBUYBUY!!! of the season. I am getting one or two gifts for my closer friends and family, and not because the TV tells me to. I do it in honor of the gifts the Three Wise Men gave Baby Jesus on his [supposed] birthday, in honor of the spirit of giving that this season should be about--and in that giving, I will give my love and my prayers to the people dying in Iraq, when they should be having a peaceful holiday season (and that includes Ramadan).
And now, for your enjoyment, Felicity Artemis' take on Jesus Spinning in the Grave:
I've done some soulsearching and I thought that since Christmas is Jesus' birthday and everything, maybe we should just ask Jesus what he thinks of an economic boycott of Christmas, and so I meditated and prayed for his guidance. I asked him what he thought, and he spoke to me thus:
Quoth Jesus:
"I am of woman born. I came to this world through her glorious grace as she swelled and opened and brought me forth from the womb of her. I was bathed in the blood and the body of the Mother of Life as I came in. She is the first I will ever know and I am blessed to the heavens for this gift, this life. Red is the blood of Creation. All my blessed life I squirmed and walked and danced naked upon the fertile green wonder beneath my feet, this place, this home, this belly warm. Green is the blood of the plants that sustain all Life.
Quite honestly, I love the red and the green, but I don't like Christmas, even though I'm Jesus and it's my birthday and everything. I know you all mean well, but it really bothers me...
For one thing, no one ever asks me what I want for Christmas. Don't you even want to know what I want? Okay, I'm gonna tell you. Maybe if I do then finally I might get my Christmas wish. Here it is: I want people to stop dropping bombs on each other in my name. Do you hear me? I want the warmongering profiteers to stop pillaging and sucking the lifeblood out of earth-based, indigenous peoples, turning them into fodder for corporate machinery to continue to produce more and more things that are designed to be thrown away. I pray thee, not in my name! I never gave my blessings upon these acts. It makes me sad and sick.
Speaking of sadness and sickness, another thing I want for Christmas is: I want off this fucking cross, okay? Jesus! Isn't it enough already? Don't you want to move on? How can you affix your gaze upon the symbol of my ghastly torture and think you can just go off and have a nice day. Don't you see that you create from that upon which you focus? If you can get rid of this ghoulish necrophilic visual, you can finally free my immortal soul from this perpetual torture, and then maybe you can see my true nature and hear what it is I really came here to say. Hello! No seriously, if you love me, you will take me down off of this thing. It's what I want for
Christmas, for god's sake, it's the holidays, I feel like dancing, wanna drink some eggnog...
This Christmas I want the people of the Earth to celebrate Birth, the birth of life itself and of every being as all are the children of God. I am but one sacred son, with a big reputation for telling the truth. Then may it be known that all prayers lead me to you, for you are my reflection. Behold the Kingdom of God is within you. Haven't I said that already? What part of the kingdom of God is within you don't you understand?
Your power, today, my sistren and brethren, is in the almighty dollar. If you are politically and spiritually in opposition to the heinous killing spree conducted to advance the values of corporate capitalism, blood for oil, the spread of western monoculture, a McDonald's in every village, all must now buy seeds from Monsanto that are engineered so they cannot turn a second crop... If you are strong enough to hold yourselves accountable for your part upholding the system that is essentially a suicide pact, then this Christmas you will use the almighty dollar as a tool of conscious evolution.
For Christmas, I, the Lord Jesus Christ, wish to see an economic boycott of Christmas. I pray thee, stop shopping! Make my Christmas wish come true by not buying presents, withdraw your support of the economic system that is holding you and me and the whole world hostage. Don't use gas to drive around shopping, chill at home with your tribe. Don't travel far and wide to visit family, just this Christmas, don't fly, just stay put for the Love of God, and redefine the family unit as those with whom you share an affinity and proximity. So that we can demonstrate to ourselves our real power to vote. Then we can sit back and watch shit come to a screeching halt. Yes! (I love upheaval...it's so full of possibility)
And now, a holiday message for you and your family from the lord Jesus Christ:
Put Your Money where your Heart is...
Boycott Christmas,
Stop Shopping!
For the love of God, for one full week...On December 25th, celebrate Birth Day, the day the people of the earth remembered that they were all the divine children of God.
And then, on January 1st at 12:00 Midnight, Celebrate the New Year 2005 as the year Americans learned how to truly vote."
Well, there you have it. It may seem farfetched, but as some of my best friends say,
"It's a tall order, but we're taller...
So let's push things forward..."
Season's Greetings,
Felicity Artemis
I'm not saying that I'm perfect---far from it. And I'm not saying that I'm going to live in depression because of what's happening in other parts of the world until the bad stuff stops, because if I did that I'd never be happy. What I'm saying is this: it seems that no one realizes the real issues at hand here, and they will go along blindly with whatever's decided because, in the immortal[ly stupid] words of Britney Spears, "We should trust the President with whatever he decides," until this country has none of its original values intact. Remember, America was founded on dissent and by people trying to break away from a tyrant. That's a far cry from what's happening now.
So, I boycott the traditional Christian Christmas and the BUYBUYBUY!!! of the season. I am getting one or two gifts for my closer friends and family, and not because the TV tells me to. I do it in honor of the gifts the Three Wise Men gave Baby Jesus on his [supposed] birthday, in honor of the spirit of giving that this season should be about--and in that giving, I will give my love and my prayers to the people dying in Iraq, when they should be having a peaceful holiday season (and that includes Ramadan).
And now, for your enjoyment, Felicity Artemis' take on Jesus Spinning in the Grave:
I've done some soulsearching and I thought that since Christmas is Jesus' birthday and everything, maybe we should just ask Jesus what he thinks of an economic boycott of Christmas, and so I meditated and prayed for his guidance. I asked him what he thought, and he spoke to me thus:
Quoth Jesus:
"I am of woman born. I came to this world through her glorious grace as she swelled and opened and brought me forth from the womb of her. I was bathed in the blood and the body of the Mother of Life as I came in. She is the first I will ever know and I am blessed to the heavens for this gift, this life. Red is the blood of Creation. All my blessed life I squirmed and walked and danced naked upon the fertile green wonder beneath my feet, this place, this home, this belly warm. Green is the blood of the plants that sustain all Life.
Quite honestly, I love the red and the green, but I don't like Christmas, even though I'm Jesus and it's my birthday and everything. I know you all mean well, but it really bothers me...
For one thing, no one ever asks me what I want for Christmas. Don't you even want to know what I want? Okay, I'm gonna tell you. Maybe if I do then finally I might get my Christmas wish. Here it is: I want people to stop dropping bombs on each other in my name. Do you hear me? I want the warmongering profiteers to stop pillaging and sucking the lifeblood out of earth-based, indigenous peoples, turning them into fodder for corporate machinery to continue to produce more and more things that are designed to be thrown away. I pray thee, not in my name! I never gave my blessings upon these acts. It makes me sad and sick.
Speaking of sadness and sickness, another thing I want for Christmas is: I want off this fucking cross, okay? Jesus! Isn't it enough already? Don't you want to move on? How can you affix your gaze upon the symbol of my ghastly torture and think you can just go off and have a nice day. Don't you see that you create from that upon which you focus? If you can get rid of this ghoulish necrophilic visual, you can finally free my immortal soul from this perpetual torture, and then maybe you can see my true nature and hear what it is I really came here to say. Hello! No seriously, if you love me, you will take me down off of this thing. It's what I want for
Christmas, for god's sake, it's the holidays, I feel like dancing, wanna drink some eggnog...
This Christmas I want the people of the Earth to celebrate Birth, the birth of life itself and of every being as all are the children of God. I am but one sacred son, with a big reputation for telling the truth. Then may it be known that all prayers lead me to you, for you are my reflection. Behold the Kingdom of God is within you. Haven't I said that already? What part of the kingdom of God is within you don't you understand?
Your power, today, my sistren and brethren, is in the almighty dollar. If you are politically and spiritually in opposition to the heinous killing spree conducted to advance the values of corporate capitalism, blood for oil, the spread of western monoculture, a McDonald's in every village, all must now buy seeds from Monsanto that are engineered so they cannot turn a second crop... If you are strong enough to hold yourselves accountable for your part upholding the system that is essentially a suicide pact, then this Christmas you will use the almighty dollar as a tool of conscious evolution.
For Christmas, I, the Lord Jesus Christ, wish to see an economic boycott of Christmas. I pray thee, stop shopping! Make my Christmas wish come true by not buying presents, withdraw your support of the economic system that is holding you and me and the whole world hostage. Don't use gas to drive around shopping, chill at home with your tribe. Don't travel far and wide to visit family, just this Christmas, don't fly, just stay put for the Love of God, and redefine the family unit as those with whom you share an affinity and proximity. So that we can demonstrate to ourselves our real power to vote. Then we can sit back and watch shit come to a screeching halt. Yes! (I love upheaval...it's so full of possibility)
And now, a holiday message for you and your family from the lord Jesus Christ:
Put Your Money where your Heart is...
Boycott Christmas,
Stop Shopping!
For the love of God, for one full week...On December 25th, celebrate Birth Day, the day the people of the earth remembered that they were all the divine children of God.
And then, on January 1st at 12:00 Midnight, Celebrate the New Year 2005 as the year Americans learned how to truly vote."
Well, there you have it. It may seem farfetched, but as some of my best friends say,
"It's a tall order, but we're taller...
So let's push things forward..."
Season's Greetings,
Felicity Artemis
So, starting December 18th, I'm not buying anything. From anywhere. I'll stock up on Soymilk Nog the week before and celebrate Yule in style--either with my family or my friends. And, it looks like, here, because I don't think I'm going to have enough money to get my ass to Canada and then India. I'm probably going to put off Canada till Jan 15th. Which works, because then I can probably make it to the orientations for classes in Jan.
There you have it: Christmas sucks. Celebrate Yule instead. Or Ramadan. Or Kwanza, or Hanukkah, or NOTHING. Celebrate the fact that you're alive on Goddess's green earth, that you have your health, and that you're not dying a miserable death in Fallujah, American or Iraqi. Isn't that enough, for Christ's sake?
--Your Entirely Bitter Universe
--Your Entirely Bitter Universe
